Everything about art is exceptional to me and nothing about me is exceptional to art.
This reminds me of my father saying he was a Jack of all trades but a master of none. However in reality everything he did was exceptional. He was a good painter, electrician and contractor and people hired him to do all kinds of projects. It was not his job, it was his passion. He was humble about his abilities and would read up on the skills and just do it. I was in awe of his commitment to his exceptional gift of remodeling people’s homes and lives.
Today my daughter told me with each new medium I learn it only enhances my artistic abilities. She said she can’t wait to see what I come up with next and what I heard in my mind was….I’m a Jack of all trades and a master of none.
I pray I am showing those following me what my Dad gave me. Be humble and be willing to improve yourself and the lives of others through the means of your God given talents.
Yesterday I landed myself into the hospital. Why? What happened you might ask? Fear. The same fear I said I was not feeling!
Well I thought I was not operating in fear. So let’s break it down.
Fear is defined in Dictionary.com as a distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, pain, etc., whether the threat is real or imagined; the feeling or condition of being afraid.
For the past few days my oldest daughter had observed that my face was swollen on one side. I saw it but I was not overly concerned about it. Yesterday she asked why was I speaking out of one side of my mouth. Okay! I’m a little concerned now but I move on with my day. “Promise me you’ll call your doctor Mom.” The last words she said to me.
I went on to get some chores completed and true I wasn’t feeling good but nothing really not out of the normal for me except now, I’m feeling impending doom. (Really it could have just been the feeling of impending housework. I like a clean house but I don’t care to do the cleaning). Anyway, the feeling is overwhelming and I start to cry. I pray about it and I then decide to go to urgent care just to get checked out and keep my promise. One ambulance ride and several test later, I get invited to a sleepover at the local hospital.
This morning the mediation is about casting your cares on Jesus. Yesterday I missed the mediation and it was on the topic of fear. This situation comes to mind as being a test. Not that God is testing me but he is convicting me. He did bring it to my attention that regardless of the pending test results he is paying close attention and I have nothing to be afraid of. He is the author of my life and Yesterday I was operating in fear. Fear for my children not for myself. Did I take care of everything. Will they be okay? I even mentioned it in my prayer. I was prepared for his will but what about my children. It was one of them that set this fear in my mind. Maybe the past experience of losing a parent who did not seek medical help influenced her. I had to ask myself am I afraid to be the parent and take the lead and make the decisions for myself and my family? I wasn’t being told by my own intuition that I needed medical attention. I’m not so sure. I do know now fear played a big part of me sitting on this hospital bed.
Fear can come in so many forms. I am not in fear for my future, of being alone or taking care of all the responsibilities left to me to discern. As confident as I am in God’s plans for my life I realize that there are still things I have not surrendered to Him.
If I have anything to fear it will be the hospital bill that’s following this venture. Nope Wonderers, it is already covered. Thank you Jesus!
Thank you for perusing and have a wonderful joyous day.
It’s Monday and you know what time it is. Today though, my madness is a little bit different.
Last Friday evening my daughter called waking me out of sleep to tell me to gas up my car because a hurricane was on its way to Texas. I got up and did just that. (Thanks baby for looking out for your mama!) Saturday morning when I awoke my mind was telling me to gas up my husband’s car also. We did not know how bad it was going to get and I might need both cars filled with gas.
I try to ride his car around once a week to keep it running in good condition until someone else takes over the car . So I take it out and ride around the subdivision. I look at the gas gauge and I can’t determine whether it needs gas or not. We’ve had this car since 2007 and today I do not understand how to read the gauge. I mean there is a white line up to the “F” but there is a red dot at the “E”. My mind is questioning is it full or is it empty. So I park the car and pull out the owner’s manual looking for clarification. That didn’t help, it only confused me more. At this point I’m thinking I had put gas in it the week prior but I can’t remember to be sure. (Senior moment.) So I just decide I’m gonna drive to the gas station anyway. Either way no harm in taking the drive. That’s when the miracle happened.
I start the car and only two bars show up at the top of the gauge at “F”. The lower bars had disappeared. As if the car was saying, “Denise the car is full dummy.” I had never seen it do this before. I was questioning whether it was a magnetic glitch in the gauge or maybe the light was blown. I just keep looking at it and thinking the two bars were glowing brighter than usual but I still felt I needed to go to the gas station. So off I went. At the pump it took $1.99 and it was full.
I got back into the car and on the way home I just started crying. I mean bawling. I had been praying for discernment and to trust my intuition. And right in front of me, here it is. Evidence that God is listening to my prayers and I was questioning it. I cried until I started laughing. All this time and through all the things he brought me through I was still questioning what was real. It gave me a total new perspective on my past, life with my family, my husband’s love and his passing and for my future. It made me realize going forward I don’t have to question God anymore. He is working for my good and he loves me. My faith has been renewed. If he can darken the control panel in a car, he can do anything!
Now you may think I’m losing it. Some may say it was just a malfunction in the panel or maybe my husband. It’s not the first time something strange happened in his car. (That’s another story for another day.) What I know is:
God has dominion over every thing and he will use whatever he needs to get our attention and if we call out to him he will answer. Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus or Lord. Roman 8:39
Wonderers, have a great day. Use your magnetic personalities and draw God’s love into your lives. Thank you for perusing and remember….
Sitting here at Dunkin’ Donuts thinking about how Jesus saved my life while eating a donut and drinking coffee. I have a Doctor appointment in about an hour. It is not going to look good now. I thought it was to be earlier with fasting labs. I hadn’t eaten a thing since yesterday evening. I was ready. Turns out I was early and I am to go back later. I needed to get something to eat to cover all the insulin I injected earlier. So here I sit while sugar ooze through my veins thinking about how Jesus saved my life.
This is a testimony on how we don’t pay attention to our own sins. It just came to mind how ungrateful this act is. Intentionally, unintentionally everything we do counts. It just started out as having a donut. That simple, the adversary got me to do harm to myself. I’m not going to dwell on it. I messed up. I’m going to pray over it and move on.
Thank you for convicting me and blessing me. Please forgive me for my arrogance and ignorance. In not really thinking about it, I took a chance on possibly damaging my body causing an early ending to my life. Forgive me for not thinking of your perfect will for my life. Forgive me for not thinking of my family. Forgive me for not cooperating with the medical team you laid out for me to be healed. Forgive me for not showing courage and strength when the adversary tempted me. Lord, I love you and I will do better. The victory belongs to you Lord. In Jesus’s name, Amen.
I invited you into my day to hopefully show how easily we can be tempted. We need to be watchful at all times. How can we serve God’s will on this earth if we are not ready and able to serve. What is your weakness?
Glory be to God for giving me the courage to write this message.
Jesus loves me this I know for the Bible tells me so. I was told to paint. If you remember I had a canvas out waiting to start. I found this picture that I blogged in this post. So I’m updating the post to include my painting. I hope you enjoy it.
During the road trip To Philadelphia I came down for breakfast when I met Patricia. She said people call her Pat, some Tricia but family call her Patricia. She was older than me which made me feel comfortable. I always got along with older women.
After a few casual exchanges I asked if I could sit with her. We had a very long talk. She knew who I was because God sent her to give me a message. She started talking about her past which mirrored mines in so many ways. She gave confirmation to my thoughts. She had me down to the point of my existence. My attempt at existing.
We spoke of issues of abandonment, child molestation, physical abuse, verbal abuse, introverted shyness, being mean spirited, being angry with a hateful tongue, adultery, and all the other adversaries we encountered. Personalities that hid behind my confident smile.
And he still loves me. He chose me. He saved the spirit inside of me for a higher purpose. Elevated me from the mired in which I existed. Everything worked for good in the end. Even down to the reason why we were having breakfast. She was visiting with her daughters for a girl weekend just like me and my girls.
I was feeling hopeful so I showed her the pictures I took earlier that morning. I was so proud of the picture. She explained that I was the tall flower shinning in the light. The smaller flowers were babies in Christ. The flowers with lost peddles were older spirits and the dead flowers were all who had died and were waiting for Christ. The flower standing tall in the sun had come to it’s full potentials and was going to be plucked ….so I’ll tell you what I’ve learned.
Tomorrow is not promised. Live for God today. If you believe that Christ died for the sins of the world and rose again you will have salvation. There is nothing, nothing that can separate God’s love for you. There is nothing you could have done or had done to you that he will forsake you. Ask him for forgiveness with a grateful heart and he will save you. God is a God of love.
Love one another and love yourself.
Forgive yourself and forgive others.
Find joy in everything you do.
Live with appreciation and gratitude.
Pray about everything. Worry about nothing.
Meditation improves your relationship with God.
You don’t have to search for happiness. All God’s love is waiting for you!
I’m trying to stay focused on God but something happens to me when I hear a lie. I just go all willy-nilly on a person. From 0 to 100 and back down to 75 is how my husband used to explain it. And it hurts. Not just me but everyone who is in the room, within earshot even. I hear them questioning what or who set me off. I didn’t want to be that person, I don’t even know when she appeared or when I became the one person I swore I would never be. I pray to bind that personality and I feel the difference when I hear the lie. I try to stay centered. Sometime I perfect it with grace. Other times I catch myself in mid hype and slow down the reaction. It’s the journey I’m traveling. The road to the crown is bumpy. It is my destination so I try to rise above it.